What Would Jesus Say About Gay Marriage?

I don’t want you to think that I am about to tell you what I think Jesus would think. That would be rather pointless. And stupid. If someone tries to base their opinion on their opinion of someone else’s opinion, leave them to it. What I want to do is examine a situation in which Jesus talks about marriage. From there we can dialogue about how his view of marriage relates to the homosexual community.

First thing’s first, the Bible is our authority on any truth issue. For more information about that you can see our other articles on our beliefs about the Bible.

The text from which this argument comes is Matthew 19:3-12. For brevity’s sake I will not quote the passage here. Pull it up in your browser here, then keep it open to refer back and forth as we work through the passage.

Now, let’s work through this at thirty thousand feet to get a firm grasp on the context.

Jesus is being approached by the religious leaders of the time, and these religious leaders are attempting to trap him in a major theological issue of the time. They approach him about divorce. One group interprets the Torah (specifically Deuteronomy 24:1) liberally, saying that a man is allowed to divorce his wife for any reason when she displeases him. The other group interprets this more conservatively to mean that a man can divorce his wife only in instances of infidelity. By asking Jesus to choose sides, they are making him choose a position open to argumentation and refutation.

Notice how Jesus answers their question: instead of talking about when you can divorce, he explains the goal of marriage (vs. 4-6), that one man joins one woman (making a statement against polygamy) and they become one flesh to be separated by no man but God. Instead of taking the bait, he exposes the sinfulness of the question itself, and explains that the divorce clause was only inserted into the Law because of their sinfulness (vs. 8). Therefore, arguing for divorce in any circumstance is arguing in favor of man’s sinfulness in opposition to God’s righteousness and ability to redeem.

The disciples, always good for comic relief, respond (vs. 10), “dang man, I’d rather not marry then get married to the wrong person and not be allowed to divorce her.” Ever heard that one before? I know many young people who live by this philosophy of marriage. They take the rewards of marriage (companionship, sex, love, and intimacy) without ever risking the tough times (devotion through personal crises, vulnerability, commitment, and financial difficulty) that accompany faithfulness through marriage. They are espousing scriptural truth (in a bad way) and don’t even know it!

How does Jesus respond to his disciples? He says (vs. 11), “I understand. Some people are not ready to hear this teaching.” It seems like he takes the burden of marriage off the disciples, right? Not entirely. His next statement explains the expected cost of not accepting God’s rules defining marriage. Celibacy.

Jesus identifies three types of people who are right to not get married (vs. 12): those who are celibate from birth, those who become celibate because of life circumstances, and those who choose celibacy for the cause of Christ and the kingdom of heaven. Here, he refers to celibacy through the example of eunuchs.

A eunuch is a man who was incapable of having sex, usually because of castration. Jesus says that whether you were created celibate, made to be celibate, or choose to be celibate for the work of the kingdom, the rules of marriage still stand; you just decide to accept it or reject it (latter part of vs. 12). You still have to make a choice about whether you will obey God’s commands concerning marriage or whether you will follow your own path, which is sin.

Now, let us create our own situation in which someone approaches Jesus and asks him whether two men committed to each other in a loving relationship should be allowed to get married. The questioner would be attempting to force Jesus to either deny love to a person or condone a disparate view of marriage. Jesus does not play nicely with man-constructed traps. He would immediately respond in the same manner as he did with the issue of divorce.

Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.

Jesus was fully God and fully man. He knows the minds of men and he knows the future. What he said two thousand years ago was said with full knowledge of the current controversy over gay marriage. Jesus responded to his disciples very plainly and his answer still stands; you can choose to accept God’s plan for marriage, or reject it, but his plan is still the path of righteousness.

Whether you were born gay, whether your environment growing up forced you into a life of homosexuality, or whether you struggle with homosexuality and consider yourself a committed Christian, God’s plan for marriage still stands as the path of righteousness.

Because we are told to love others, Christians should be committed to reaching out to the GLBT community. Because we are told to love God, Christians should be committed to keeping his commandments. Therefore, let those who are believers keep God’s commands governing the institution of marriage and strive for righteousness in all other areas as well.